Mourning to Dancing

This blog serves as a way to share my heart after losing the one I loved, Jody Moreing Frankfurt, to lung cancer. My hope is that as I learn to mourn her loss, that I will glorify God. Thank you for reading this blog! Please feel free to comment - it is a tremendous encouragement to me.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Report Card

Hello Friends,

It's been a week to remember in that I've had some incredible opportunities to visit with Jody's side of the family and spend time with her Mom last week. I will never forget the sweetness and Spirit led time as we laughed and cried through our memories and videos. I had the joy of being able to sincerely connect and thank her for the investment Judy made in her daughter Jody, and the generosity of heart she and Jim exhibited towards me from the day I met her (my father in law - also with the Lord). I praise God!

I went back to work at my beloved job with Spectrasonics, and so enjoy being able to be a part of that team. I am not "myself" - but they understand and are so patient and gracious.

Jesus Christ is everything to me. Nothing has changed with Him. His Word is Truth and it washes over me and I am overwhelmed with the sense of how shallow I have been. I hate my sin - and I am being profoundly blessed as I commune with Him via the holy Word of God!

I am enjoying a study on Heaven too. I am captivated by the place because my Christ is there, my citizenship is there, and my Jody is there. It is where I long to be. Until He brings me there - my heart will ache. My comfort is in the fact that He can see the end from the beginning - He is omniscient, omnipresent and (my favorite) omnipotent! Those attributes, along with the fact that He loves me enough to redeem me with the Savior's blood - even His own Son - keeps me going.

Meanwhile, I have a challenge to you husbands that read this blog.

Be better husbands.


I have had the unique blessing of reading my wife's journals. She did not journal a lot - but I have a few years worth at various times in her life. It is very sobering to read, because in the entries I can clearly see when I was being a faithful husband, and when I was frustrating her. It struck me because it feels a lot like the ultimate marital report card. Jody's pen is bounding with joy when I have done something spiritually benefical towards her, or others. In a few other entries, it was clear that I was not doing so well.

That's what is prompting me to write this - it pains me deeply to see husbands, especially christian ones, "drop the ball" regarding their marriages. I am thankful that there are not too many of those sad entires in Jody's journals - but there is no way to describe to you how much anguish I feel reading them now.

Marriage is a precious gift. My message to you husbands is:

1. Do not squander a moment of time with your bride. Love her. Show her affection. Be patient. Listen to her. I don't care how long you have been married. Turn off the tube.

2. Train yourself, and her in righteousness - with love. Pray for her. Pray with her. Protect and nurture her. Live it (don't Lord it).

3. Do not let mundane, petty things derail you - rob you - from soaking in every minute you have together. Each moment is an opportunity to invest in her. I would love to rewind time and get another crack at a few of those early years - knowing what I know now. In fact, as good as all those eighteen years were together - none were as meaningful as the last one. How I wish I could have known the future... but that's the point. You can't know the future - it belongs to God. All we really know for sure is that life is a vapor and none of us might be here tomorrow.

Hot Tip:

"The Exemplary Husband" by Stuart Scott (Get the study guide too.)

And The Ultimate Hot Tip:

Eph. 5:25-33 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church - for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery - but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

1Pet. 3:7 You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

5 Comments:

At 10:17 PM, Blogger rick said...

Thanks Scott. Such a needed reminder for us husbands who can be total boneheads at times.

Rick

 
At 7:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This reminds me of when Jesus silenced the leaders and they all walked away! It is so hard for all of us to live a life that is glorifying to the Lord in all we say and do, we are so weak and not wanting to die to self! Once again, you have raised the bar and it is our turn to come to the Lord for His strength.

 
At 7:35 AM, Blogger Scott F. said...

"...we are so weak and not wanting to die to self!"

It is so true. I depise my sin. How I thank the Mighty One for providing the resources in Christ to fight. Thank you Lord. Help us surrender to righteousness and use our godly weapons and armor!


Thanks Anonymous and Rick.

 
At 6:33 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Unfortunately, I think that I became aware of those
precious truths too late as my wife of 5 plus years
could not bear to live with me any longer. Perhaps I
may not have been able to learn those lessons had I not found myself in such a painful trial, but I'm not convinced that is the heart of the matter. The truth
of the brevity of time and how we are to be wise stewards of such a flicker of life as this gift from God, coupled with opportunity upon opportunity to do right, but mess it up by being disobediant to His Holy Word begs the question: how many times must we continue to sin against Almighty God and expect to walk away unscathed? Simple answer: much fewer than we think... how about never.

As Solomon distilled it all down for us:

"Fear God and keep His commandments..."

I'm sorry for such a long post but this subject is not just "close to home" ...it's living in my house.

So as you may have guessed, if your still reading, that I quite firmly second everything my faithful brother Scott has said regarding the husband's responsibility, or rather, privilege in those precious few years he will have with the bride of his youth.

Do not squander them, they will be gone before you know it... in any number of ways.

Take heart guys!

 
At 10:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow! To fear God and His commandments. That says it all. Thanks for the admonishment to LOVE. For Christ loved us so much to die for our sin. We are called to love and over the last 3 mos. I have realized how deeply you can love someone. Thanks for reminding me.

 

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