On This Day

Nineteen years ago, Jody and I married before a humble assembly in a park. The reality of God, and our love was so new to us. We chose this day because of the Summer Solstice - the longest day of the year, and because 6/21 would always remind us of Rev. 21:6.

I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give to the one who thirsts from the spring of the water of life without cost.

This anniversary will be celebrated on earth, in my heart. My position today is that departed saints are indeed aware of events on the earth (like the martyrs in Rev). Is that to say that they see us - or that they are aware of details like anniversaries? Don't know. Good men disagree about this.

I do know that I wish I could spend all of the time and effort I spend trying to "rebuild" my shattered life and focus all that attention on my Judith(e) Joanne! How I miss her. Words are inadequate.

If you pray for me, you need to know that lots of areas of my life are changing, even dying. I have decided after much prayer to take a break from "Coram Deo" so that I can focus on the unfinished recordings I've committed to finish in 2007. Laying that ministry down, after all of these years, has been a hard, sad, but necessary thing. I've been invited to speak at Judy's (my mom-in-law) memorial. What an honor. Please pray for this time. I have the looming tasks of finishing those most difficult and emotionally draining taxes; going through Jody's things that have yet to be sorted; and a busy summer as far as work is concerned. There are other sadness's and loss in my life that are not appropriate for me to share here - but they are profound and really hurt. God is not finished melting me down, apparently. Thank you for every prayer!

Here is the most important paragraph in my life right now (Tozer):

"God knows instantly and effortlessly all matter and all matters, all mind and every mind, all spirit and all spirits, all being and every being, all creature hood and all creatures, every plurality and all pluralities, all law and every law, all relations, all causes, all thoughts, all mysteries, all enigmas, all feeling, all desires, every unuttered secret, all thrones and dominions, all personalities, all things visible and invisible in heaven and in earth, motion, space, time, life, death, good, evil, heaven, and hell."

I am clinging unto that God, who is Jesus Christ, a Savior. My Savior.

Jody will get 19 roses today; 18 red for the anniversaries on earth, and one white for the one in heaven. I will spend the rest of the day at the wedding of a very special friend.

What a great day to be married.

Mrs. Judy Moreing; Faith Made Sight!

On June 5th, my dear mom-in-law Judy, who has been infirmed for many years, has been called home to be with the Lord.

Jody, Judy and I used to giggle about how I married Jody to "get to Judy". Judy Moreing taught me to understand the meaning of James' words - "Count it all joy."

June 5th is the exact same day her husband Jim died many years ago. Now, Judy is face to face with her Savior - and has been reunited with her hubby Jim, and her daughter Jody.

I am so jealous, and long for heaven all the more.

God has allowed me to spend a few precious days with the my family - so wonderful and edifying - yet I simultaneously sense more of my own life disintegrating - but I don't mean for that to sound bad necessarily. I am aware - and even pray - that God would *use* me. Well, in a very real sense, I suspect He's not done *breaking* me first.

So, for now - I am happy to lie in a heap at the foot of the cross - and wait on Him. Every invisible beat of my heart reminds me that He desires that I persist on the earth, and that He has plans for me. The joy of the Lord is my strength.

Lord, help me trust you alone, my Captain. You are the most high, most holy, most exalted One. May my beloved's reunion with her dad, be all the more sweet now that her mom has joined them! May your blessing saturate those of us who are left behind. Use us in the meantime for your kingdom purposes!