To All Eternity The Same

Hebrews 2:14 "Since then the children share in flesh and blood, He Himself likewise also partook of the same..."

Hebrews 4:15 "Therefore, He had to be made like His brethren in all things, that He might become a merciful and faithful high priest..."

Hebrews 2:17 "For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses..."

I am grateful for those truths, because I have never known or conceived of the type loneliness I am experiencing. Even though I am around people all the time - it is searing. This house is cold and silent - no matter how much heat and noise I pump into it. My Lord knows exactly what I'm feeling.

So how is it that I can continue to function at all? How is it that I can go back to face church, work, ministry, friends, and relatives? Simply - my Lord lives. He became flesh and suffered ultimate loss in order to redeem mankind and glorify the Father. He has conquered death and has imputed His righteousness to me. I am clinging to the promise of an eternity with Him. He has never failed! His grace has been sufficient at every point of my life. I worship Him, the worthy Lamb of God.

Thank you for reading - and praying for me. It's a comfort to know that God is being worshipped through prayer while I grieve. Jesus Christ is my joy and strength. He is all I truly have, and all I truly need. May His peace be yours.

Thankfulness

Jody was never more adorable then when she would kick in to Thanksgiving meal mode. She loved to entertain in her home. She was good at it too. I'll miss the "Turkey Dance" ritual. (A little thing she would do with the bird before it went into the oven. You had to be there.) But my fondest memories are not of the hearth and home. They are of her sweet heart - always looking for a reason to praise and thank God. I am thoroughly convinced that she went to all the trouble of making an amazing table and meal primarily so she could break out her handmade scripture cards - which were these adorable decorated cards designed to stimulate conversation about what each guest was thankful for.

When you enjoy your loved ones on this Thanksgiving, I encourage you to approach it like it's the last one you'll ever have. Be sure to take the focus off the food and the football and instead place the emphasis on the fact that God lets you take your next breath. Thank Him for the miracle of Christ's redemptive work. Thank Him for the glorious design of the gospel and for the Spirit that moves on a heart so it can beat for Him. Thank God for grace that is greater than our sin. Ditch the sentimental and pursue the truly meaningful. Confess your sin. If I knew last Thanksgiving what I know now, I would have made more of that time. God loves a thankful heart.

Col. 3:15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful.

2Sam. 22:50 "Therefore I will give thanks to Thee, O LORD, among the nations, And I will sing praises to Thy name."

2Cor. 2:14 But thanks be to God, who always leads us in His triumph in Christ, and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him in every place.

1Th. 5:16-18 Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

The reality that Jody is with the One she loves above all this Thanksgiving - makes me thankful beyond words.

To What End?

First, I thank you dear friends for reading this blog. Your comments are so treasured - and are fascinating to me - because of how God Himself uses them in my life. Your words exemplify the notion of "sharing one another's burdens". I wish you could experience how your words lift my heart. More than that - they cause me to worship YHWH.

I am most blessed in spite of the pain of these days. My daily experience is almost bizarre. I hunger for the Word as never before - and that make sense - because that is where God speaks directly to me - no barriers (except for my sinfulness). I commune with the Lord and it is sweet above all.

Psa. 119:25 My soul cleaves to the dust; Revive me according to Thy word.

Then I face the day and it is cold and lonely. I'm frozen. So, I do what my pastor friends have taught me - I preach to myself - and I rehearse that God is not unaware of what He is doing in my life - He sees it all! I cannot know everything He knows. I therefore trust in His character - which is thrice Holy, Loving, All Powerful and Just.

I drive off to work. I am surrounded by amazing, talented people who love me unconditionally. I am stimulated and refreshed - even if the work is intense. Then I leave for home. I am suddenly confronted with the fact that I won't be sharing my day with Jody. She won't be sharing her day with me. I fight the traffic - and then get busy with the mail and mealtime and the dog and the stuff that must be done. But the whole time I am nagged by the reality that I'm horribly alone. The pity party begins... To what end am I laboring? What am I building? Who am I doing all this for? Who cares?

The Spirit takes over and I begin to pray - and rehearse all the blessings and favor God has shown me - a pathetic worm of a man. I confess my unbelief - my lack of trust. I pour out my heart to Him. He listens - He prompts me to look into His Word and I read 2 Cor. 12:9:

"My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness."

And I read this blessed sentence:

In this you greatly rejoice, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ; and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, obtaining as the outcome of your faith the salvation of your souls.

And this one:

Phil. 1:6 For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.

And then:

Rev. 21:3-5 And I heard a loud voice from the throne, saying, "Behold, the tabernacle of God is among men, and He shall dwell among them, and they shall be His people, and God Himself shall be among them, and He shall wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there shall no longer be any death; there shall no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away." And He who sits on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new."

And the powerful Word of God ricochets in my mind - and I am comforted supernaturally by the Spirit. Thank You, Father God. Your grace was sufficient for today - like it always is.

The Human Side Of Things

Each day without Jody is harder. Nothing has changed with God, or my love for Him. Nothing has changed as far as my joy knowing that Jody is in bliss with her Savior, where I will be one day.

The hard part is that there is no sweet, intimate friend for me to talk to, and it really hurts. The house is so quiet at night. I miss her perfume. I miss her green eyes and red lips. I miss listening to her pray. I miss our talks. I miss our worship times. I miss our walks. I miss co-laboring in ministry. I miss everything about her.

And yet, I know that God wanted her with Him and that this circumstance is designed. I can't see what the future holds - but God can. I also know that God is good, and blesses those that trust Him. Help me, dear Lord.

Thank you for praying!

Matt. 5:4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.

Report Card

Hello Friends,

It's been a week to remember in that I've had some incredible opportunities to visit with Jody's side of the family and spend time with her Mom last week. I will never forget the sweetness and Spirit led time as we laughed and cried through our memories and videos. I had the joy of being able to sincerely connect and thank her for the investment Judy made in her daughter Jody, and the generosity of heart she and Jim exhibited towards me from the day I met her (my father in law - also with the Lord). I praise God!

I went back to work at my beloved job with Spectrasonics, and so enjoy being able to be a part of that team. I am not "myself" - but they understand and are so patient and gracious.

Jesus Christ is everything to me. Nothing has changed with Him. His Word is Truth and it washes over me and I am overwhelmed with the sense of how shallow I have been. I hate my sin - and I am being profoundly blessed as I commune with Him via the holy Word of God!

I am enjoying a study on Heaven too. I am captivated by the place because my Christ is there, my citizenship is there, and my Jody is there. It is where I long to be. Until He brings me there - my heart will ache. My comfort is in the fact that He can see the end from the beginning - He is omniscient, omnipresent and (my favorite) omnipotent! Those attributes, along with the fact that He loves me enough to redeem me with the Savior's blood - even His own Son - keeps me going.

Meanwhile, I have a challenge to you husbands that read this blog.

Be better husbands.

I have had the unique blessing of reading my wife's journals. She did not journal a lot - but I have a few years worth at various times in her life. It is very sobering to read, because in the entries I can clearly see when I was being a faithful husband, and when I was frustrating her. It struck me because it feels a lot like the ultimate marital report card. Jody's pen is bounding with joy when I have done something spiritually benefical towards her, or others. In a few other entries, it was clear that I was not doing so well.

That's what is prompting me to write this - it pains me deeply to see husbands, especially christian ones, "drop the ball" regarding their marriages. I am thankful that there are not too many of those sad entires in Jody's journals - but there is no way to describe to you how much anguish I feel reading them now.

Marriage is a precious gift. My message to you husbands is:

1. Do not squander a moment of time with your bride. Love her. Show her affection. Be patient. Listen to her. I don't care how long you have been married. Turn off the tube.

2. Train yourself, and her in righteousness - with love. Pray for her. Pray with her. Protect and nurture her. Live it (don't Lord it).

3. Do not let mundane, petty things derail you - rob you - from soaking in every minute you have together. Each moment is an opportunity to invest in her. I would love to rewind time and get another crack at a few of those early years - knowing what I know now. In fact, as good as all those eighteen years were together - none were as meaningful as the last one. How I wish I could have known the future... but that's the point. You can't know the future - it belongs to God. All we really know for sure is that life is a vapor and none of us might be here tomorrow.

Hot Tip:

"The Exemplary Husband" by Stuart Scott (Get the study guide too.)

And The Ultimate Hot Tip:

Eph. 5:25-33 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church - for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery - but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

1Pet. 3:7 You husbands likewise, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.